It has been a while.
I could say that I was too busy to write, and couldn't find the time to sit down and process life, but that would be a lie. The truth is that I didn't want to write. I did not want to pause and think about life in all its glories and miseries. Last semester was difficult, to say the least. And, the more people I talk to, the more I realize that the feeling is pretty universal. Last semester sucked. (Not the most eloquent locution, but an accurate one.) However, I realized, rather late into the semester unfortunately, that the problem wasn't the course of the semester and the life events that composed it, but rather how I faced up to what presented itself to me. I did not do well on that particular test. But I did learn from it. I learned more of the character of the God who loves me. I rediscovered some of the greatest blessings in my life. I better learned how to listen, how not to speak. I learned a bit about myself. But overall, and perhaps paradoxically, I became certain that I know nothing, except that God is real, and that He is good, and that He loves me. Outside of that, nothing I claim as knowledge is perfectly and irrefutably founded in truth, and is subject to change.
It's a good place to be, this place of unknowing. It's freeing. It is also extremely interesting and captivating to reevaluate concepts that I have always held as "truth" in order to verify their validity, or to realize their falsehood. It's humbling, this denial of human and natural arrogance, and also rather difficult for a person such as me, imperfect and broken as I am. But it is a springboard, and a wonderful way to start a new year.
So I’m back. Or, at least, I intend to be back. I enjoy writing and processing thoughts; it is good for me. However, this semester, it actually will be hard to find the time.
Peace & love,
Megs
